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October 04, 2005

my demands

• i want people to say ASS when they mean ass, and not things like "buns". to me, "buns" is way more offensive than ass.
• i want bacon in the breakroom instead of triscuits. triscuits are just mean.

Fortunately for the company, I've been replaced by a very small shell script by Joe (at my request). So they don't have to deal with my demands, and I can just make bacon and say ASS all i want, at home.

NOTE: this is a joke. JOKE.

Posted by lisa at October 04, 2005 03:44 PM

Comments

this week on Iron Chef America, Jeffrey Steingarten identified one of the dishes served as "the all-important bacon course." every meal should have one!

Posted by: georg on October 4, 2005 09:00 PM

i completely failed to eat bacon at dinner, but i did have HAM, which is also an excellent way to consume pork.

i doubt there is going to be any bacon-- or ham-- at the indian place tomorrow night.

Posted by: lisa on October 4, 2005 09:21 PM

It could be worse: it could be bacon-flavored Triscuits. Or Chikin in a Biskit.

I'm not used to being friends with someone who knows more than one Joe.

Posted by: Joseph H. Vilas on October 5, 2005 11:23 AM

really, either one of you could have written that script, and would have, too, so in this case, it probably doesn't matter which one i'm referring to.

Posted by: lisa on October 5, 2005 11:29 AM

#!/bin/human
#
#a little present from Joe
#don't forget to cron it mon-fri

$serverArray = [server1, server2, server3, server4];
$i = 0;

while (time(today,hour) > 8 && time(today,hour) 3)
{
echo User error;
$i = 0;
}
}

echo See you tomorrow;

Posted by: lisa on October 6, 2005 03:07 PM

I can bring home the bacon,
fry it up in a pan,
and you can say "ASS"
while you make us a flan...

'Cause I'm a cusser, and I cook....

Posted by: Joseph H. Vilas on October 6, 2005 04:57 PM

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